Something I may regret posting but here goes

I am reading a mind blowing book. Its about missionaries. The writer is from India. He is telling his life story. When he was very young, he felt God call him to be a missionary. His story is amazing. He felt God telling him he needed to preach the word, but he had always been a very shy person, and wrestles with doubts and fears, until one morning after a lot of prayer, he walks down the street and is hit with the the holy spirit. Every one he sees, he feels is in trouble, he sees they are suffering and lost in life, and his heart aches with love to help them. He is moved to start speaking to every one he sees about God, which then starts his missionary life to remote places of northern India. His life is very poor and simple. Hunger, beatings, and many other things threaten him, but he is not concerned with it, he only keeps is eye on helping his fellow brothers and sisters understand God.

Later on, he gets an opportunity to be sponsored by a church to come to Texas and study at a seminary. I was blown away by the chapter he wrote on his culture shock coming to America. He doesn't even arrive to his destination before he is taken a back just at a lay over in the JFK airport. He sits down and looks at every one's clothes, he is just blown away by their clothes! He writes, "I stared in amazement at how they treated their beautiful clothes and shoes. The richness of the fabrics and colors was beyond anything I had ever seen. As I would discover again and again, this nation routinely takes its astonishing wealth for granted. . . . . .I compared their clothing to that of the native missionary evangelists whom I had left only a few weeks before. Many of them walk barefoot between villages or work in flimsy sandals. Their threadbare cotton garments would not be acceptable as cleaning rags in the United States. Then I discovered most Americans have closets full of clothing they wear only occasionally -and I remembered the years I traveled and worked with only the clothes on my back. And I had lived the normal life style of most village evangelists."

The chapter is mind blowing to say the least, as he goes on to describe how he handles adjusting to life in Texas! There are a few points he made that really struck me. First he talks about how hard it is to understand that these two places exist together, on the same planet in the same time. Where some people have so much they can waist with out blinking an eye, and other people are in such need. He said that God had blessed the earth with enough resources and money for every one to be provided for, but that he gave generously to some and gave little to others, and it is the responsibility of those who have been given more than enough to SHARE, to think about, and empathize with the suffering brother.

Another thing he said that seems alarming is that he felt a deep call to warn our nation, that God has blessed us greatly but that that blessing wouldn't necessarily go on forever. There are so many times in the old testament where the Jewish nation became prosperous and started taking it for granted, and worse began suppressing the poor and not caring for those in need. I remember reading Amos and feeling like he could have been talking about the U.S. It says:

You push away every thought of coming disaster,
but your actions only bring the day of judgment closer.

How terrible for you who sprawl on ivory beds
and lounge on your couches,
eating the meat of tender lambs from the flock
and of choice calves fattened in the stall.

You sing trivial songs to the sound of the harp
and fancy yourselves to be great musicians like David.

You drink wine by the bowlful
and perfume yourselves with fragrant lotions.
You care nothing about the ruin of your nation.^b]">[b]

Therefore, you will be the first to be led away as captives.
Suddenly, all your parties will end.

That sounds pretty bad I know. My point in bringing all this up, is not to make any one feel like we are horrible for being rich. It is a blessing, it is not a sin to have money. But how we are using our wealth is, I would say, not good. After I read this chapter about this missionary going on and on about how he can't believe how much we take for granted, clean running water, electricity that is always working, roads to every where etc etc, I made some one else read the chapter. They got upset, because they said, "what are we supposed to do? Thank God constantly every time we have a glass of water? What do they want us to do? Why can't all the rich people give money?" They didn't get it that they were in fact the "rich." When I tried to explain better they gave a million reasons why they have no money to give, saying over and over "I have no money." I couldn't help but wonder what that missionary would think of this person with a bank account saying, "I have no money."

So this has been plagueing my mind. I want to absolutely point out, I am not trying to condem and judge people, I myself have been horribly horribly horribly selfish with my money. I've been taking trips for my own pleasure in places where I could have helped so much. I'm mostly writing this out because more and more I am feeling bad about it, and I want to change! I don't want to sit here in all my comfort and wealth while other peopel are dying because they didn't eat in a month, or because they got diarria and had no medicine or hospitol or water! But I'm clueless as to how to stop this? Some times I really think. . . I need to just go be a missionary, I need to leave this country and go where people need help. And then the other idea is, that is crazy, i can't help, what could I do? it is so much easier to sit here and watch some tv, do I really think I could handle living a poor life?

But really how much longer can I hear about all this, and do nothing? If you are one of those wonderful friends that reads my blogs and also prays, please pray for me, if I am really being called into missions and to have the intelligent and guts to do it, and send a prayer up for the poor the suffering the oppressed!

Their is a line in the book I like a lot.

The only weapon that will ever effectively win the war against disease, hunger, injustice and poverty is the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

some chatter

OK, so I guess for now I've decided not to invite more people to my blog, I kind of have the idea to blog more and I think later I will invite more people.

Any who I guess I don't have a whole lot to say, but there are some things I could chat about. I am realizing more and more I am a person who is motivated by her feelings. I am a feely person. I don't think that is bad, but of course it could have some down falls if I let it. I can't let my emotions run my life, but some times I'm sure they do.

On another note, I had a job interview yesterday. It went well, I'm sure I will be employed by next week. yay! Its always a good feeling to get a job when you've been unemployed for half the year. Some how it makes you appreciate it a lot more. Funny how it is going with out something that makes you appreciate it. Like for example, Wisconsin! I have always been a hater. Ever since my body experienced the pain of below zero wind chill and long dark winter nights, I have never liked living here. But this is my second year in a row coming back to the u.s. in the middle of summer, and every time I come back I find somethings more beautiful. Our landspace is soooo green, even the boring farm fields look amazing to me now. However I think I'm way too in love with the ocean to ever be a true fan of wisconsin. But I definitely appreciate it more.

OK well thats all I got for now. until next time. peace

In the morning, feeling half write

Blog! Blogging! Haha, can you tell I don't have much to say. There are times I really like blogging but mostly it gets pushed way back, and I hardly ever do it. Its a funny thing this blog, there are only a handful of people I invited to read it, so really its kind of like I'm just writing to these few friends (hi guys). But then, any one could find it and read it, so perhaps my audience is just a bit larger. I kind of would like to invite every one I know to read it, but then it seems like I couldn't write very personally, although I'd say mostly I don't write very personally to begin with. But then, thats kind of silly, because I should be real and personal with any one I know, right? What do you think I should do, invite more people? I don't blog regularly enough to have a following any way, but I think regardless, it might make me think in the back of my mind, " I can't write this, so and so is reading." (If I ever have a kid I think I'll actually name him so and so) And its just no fun to write with limitations like this, no?

The sister

Today it was all about sisterhood. My sister and I went shopping and then out to lunch and then went shopping for our brother and future sister to be's shower gifts and then had a little picnic. Not to sound cheesy but I seriously love my sister. I know when it comes down to it, we are just about complete opposites in almost every conceivable way. But I feel in our relationship we genuinely care for each other, and since we grew up together, we can really understand each other. It is so good to have some one to confide in like this, and to talk to, and to listen and have complete understanding. There are few things better than a good sister in the world. I suppose I'm making this sound like we had big life changing conversations today or something, but no, it was just a good day. And how exciting is this, I will soon have another one, my first big sister in fact. Is this post really cheesey? I could spice it up. . . yes later this afternoon I will. . . . um. . . stealthily stalk down a ninja and encage him in an epic battle on a burning speed boat racing away from a giant sunami wave! HOOAAHHOOO!! AHHH! (how's that for excitment?)

Today

Today I planted some plants, my fingers were covered in dirt/clay. It makes swatting mosquitoes messy.

Today I visited my grandma. It was the first I saw her since Christmas. She always looks more cute than I remember.

Today I joined my mom's beginner Spanish class for dinner at a Mexican restaurant. It was a nice change of pace to finally be in a room where I knew the most Spanish of any one, with the exception of the teach and Mexican staff of course.

Today I saw Molly Ann. It was great as usual. It involved cheese, mint, and picture frames.

if your from WI and you are wearing a bathing suit you are pretty much NAKED!

My friends I have traveled a good portion of the globe trying to find the answer to the question we all will inevitably ask ourselves from time to time. What would happen if I was on a hot Caribbean island and wanted to cool off in the ocean, and while I was striping down to my bikini, my intimidatingly handsome boyfriend, annoyingly starts to take pictures of me? Well today after a good year of work (finding an intimidatingly handsome boyfriend in the Caribbean, and getting him to date me, and placing a camera in his hands while we are at the beach) has finally paid off, for today I have the answer! This is what will most likely happen:

For one, the pictures are taken fast, and at a time when you feel most self-conscious resulting in some rather unsightly pictures such as this photo to the right:

Two, after over come with vulnerability, and unanswered pleas for ceasing, you find yourself punching the boyfriend in the stomach when all his attention is on the camera, making this a rather powerful blow. This causes him to accidentally turn on the video feature of the camera and results in the following ridiculous conversation recorded.

I like God, Fisherman, and Surfing

(Blogging from paradise)



"What a wonderful God we have-he is the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the source of every mercy, and the one who so wonderfully comforts and strengthens us in our hardships and trials. And why does he do this? So that when others are troubled, needing our sympathy and encouragement, we can pass on to them this same help and comfort God has given us. "

There is a fishing association close to my house I need to walk past going into town. When I am walking back in the evening there are usually fisherman coming in on their boats with huge sea creatures that get picked up by hungry customers, who take the fish in hand, hop on the back of a motor bike, and ride home with the fish hanging in their hand. I like to watch this.

I get to go surfing today!! I'm way excited about it! I haven't been surfing since I was in Ecuador last year. There is a good chance I will get my butt kicked because the waves suck and well, I'm not a very good surfer, but I don't like to admit the former. So I will pretend I am the worlds best surfer in hopes to trick myself into a great surf session. Wish me luck!